


Icarus Always Falls(Discontinued)

by HiFunctionSociopath



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: 1940s, Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Wings, Assets & Handlers, Brooklyn, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, But also, Canon Compliant, Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up, I'm Sorry, Internalized Homophobia, LINK IN THE DESCRIPTION TO THE NEW ONE, M/M, Maybe I'll put chapter specific tags at the beginning of chapters, Memory Loss, Mild Gore, POV Multiple, Period-Typical Homophobia, Playlist, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Psychological Torture, Queer Brooklyn, THIS HAS BEEN MOVED, Torture, Wingfic, Wings, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, World War II, also not, meaning strange, probably, thank you, this is kinda that mutation shit from X-Men, yeah thats probably better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-28
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-06 08:47:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17936597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HiFunctionSociopath/pseuds/HiFunctionSociopath
Summary: In which Bucky Barnes is born with wings and Steve isn't. Things happen...This work has been discontinued because I was definitely not satisfied with how it was going so it has been moved. It is now going to be a series. The first part is in progress and is calledBrooklyn, Brooklyn, Take Me In. I can promise you that this series will be finished and will not be abandoned.





	1. James

**Author's Note:**

> Don't crucify me this is my first fic. This is me vomiting my ideas for a book I'm writing but I'm stuck at the beginning. Thank you for clicking on this. Also, I struggled titling this because I didn't want to use something someone else already had so... yeah. You can find me on most things like Tumblr and DeviantArt and such at HiFunctionSociopath as well.
> 
> Also, I know literally everyone in the history of fanfiction and Ao3 hates people who update every three months but like, I got homework. Also sports. So I'll do my best even if no one ends up reading this.

James Barnes was born in Brooklyn, New York, 1917. He was a perfectly normal little boy. His mother and father loved him and they lived in a nice neighborhood. Or as nice as it got in Brooklyn during that time. They weren't rich by any means but James wasn't going hungry at night either. The furnace in their apartment worked and the window locked. They had a fire escape as all apartments do. They had neighbors as well. That was the only problem with a lot of apartments in Brooklyn. The walls were as thin as paper and you could hear everything from snores to arguments to... other things. Yes, James was perfectly a perfectly normal kid. 

 

Well, except for one thing.

 

James had massive, black, feathered wings sprouting straight out of his shoulder blades that only got bigger as he did.

 

He was only three at the time when he had the sudden realization that, yes, he was definitely different. Though, at the heart of queer Brooklyn, the wings were the least strange thing about his neighborhood or even the building he lived in.  

 

He did knock things over quite a bit in his early years because he struggled to control them a lot. Kids knock things over just by breathing on them, you know. His mother and father didn't mind at all. They loved his wings and thought he looked like an angel. They didn't treat him any different than any other kid though. James really was too young to appreciate that but he did later. 

 

Figuring out that, heck yeah, he could actually  _ fly _ with those things sprouting out of his back, was quite an experience for James’ poor parents. 

 

James figured that if he watched the birds fly and copy them maybe he could figure out flying for himself. He sat in the window and watched the pigeons fly past his window every so often and when they did he tried to copy the motions of their wings with his and sure enough they flapped too. 

 

James was as ecstatic as you can imagine a four-year-old being.

 

He came tearing into the kitchen. “Ma! Look!” he cried as he flapped them and proceeded to knock a glass of water flying against the kitchen wall.

 

“Darling, calm down!” his mother tried to calm him, “You’re going to hurt someone!”

 

“But ma!”

 

“Jamie, dear, look at your father, please calm down.”

 

James looked to his father and saw George Barnes leaning heavily against the counter staring at his son.

 

“Winnie, do you remember how baby birds learn to fly?”

 

“Yes dear their pare-” she stopped and looked frantically over at James.

 

“I don’t think I can do that to him. He’s too young if that’s really what we will have to do.”

 

“Well, it’s not like we know anyone else who has this problem!”

 

“He’s four! We should wait.”

 

Meanwhile, James was looking between his parents like he was watching a very interesting table tennis match, snapping his head back and forth between the two.

 

“What do you have to do? What am I too young for?” he asked.

 

Both of his parents looked up in surprise as if they’d forgotten he was there.

 

“We’ll tell you when you’re older,” his father replied.

 

“But I’m a whole four years old!”

 

“No,” his mother said sharply, “You haven’t even started school yet. You’ll likely learn there.”

 

James snapped his wings open and back in irritation, “Fine.” and stomped off to the single bedroom.

 

~~~

 

A year later James started his first year of school. Surprisingly he wasn’t the only kid in his class that had some sort of mutation like his wings although they were the most obvious. The girl in the row next to him had short nubs on her head that could be the beginnings of horns according to the very basic five-year-old understanding of things that James had. 

 

James thought this whole school thing was okay but it wasn’t his favorite. At least there were other kids his age here that he got to play with. His building didn’t really have any other kids that he knew of and that made things boring a lot of the time. Mostly he just spent his time watching birds out his window and helping his ma. 

 

He did like learning new things though. He liked learning how to read because it made just one more thing to occupy his time with. He also liked art even though he thought he was terrible at it although everyone assured him that he was young and he would learn. 

 

Writing was quite fun as well. He liked how his name looked on paper when the nuns wrote it down for him,  _ James Buchanan Barnes _ , and showed him which letters were which. He learned the alphabet and how to write each letter. 

 

Considering all the things James was doing at school people were surprised when he told them his favorite subject was arithmetic. He especially loved numbers and he liked learning how to add them to make bigger numbers. The nuns told him that he may like number less when they were bigger and he was doing more than just adding but he doubted it. 

 

His favorite part of every school day was going home and waiting for his father to get back for work so he could sit down and eat supper with his parents while he told them all about the things he had learned that day. They smiled and laughed and told him that he had a great mind and he would do big things someday even though his parents knew that mutants don’t get many good jobs because of how they look. Life would have been much easier for James Barnes if he hadn’t been born with wings.

 

~~~

 

James was walking home from school one day on a sunny afternoon and he was enjoying himself. He was six years old and felt near invincible. He had aced his maths test that day and one of the nuns had praised his efforts. He couldn’t wait to tell his parents about it over dinner. 

 

As James walked farther down the street he heard a noise coming from a side alley. He stopped and listened, his wings fluttering nervously.

 

Shouts. 

 

A loud crash.

 

James started running as fast as his little six-year-old legs could carry him to the mouth of an alley.

 

He looked down the alley just in time to see a kid his age push over a small, blond kid who looked around five.. James started walking down the alley again and…

 

And that damn kid got right back up off the ground, fists raised.

 

That stubborn punk. He was going to get himself killed!

 

“Hey!” James shouted into the alley as he advanced, wings spread to try and make himself look bigger, “Pick on someone your own size!”

 

The bully turned, took one look at his wings and fled toward the only exit he saw; the mouth of the alley and straight toward James who cuffed him with one wing as the kid brushed past him.

 

“You didn’t need to do that. I had him on the ropes.” the skinny blond kid said irritably.

 

And that was when James Barnes met the stubborn punk that was little Steve Rogers.

 

* * *

 

Each chapter will have a song that I think kinda fits it. This chapters song is [Hero by Family of the Year](https://youtu.be/iMVc0vG4K_k). 

 

*This chapter has been edited*


	2. Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and Steve meet after Steve is a dumbass.

Steve Rogers was not having a good day. 

 

He had also had a terrible week.

 

Steve had to move into an apartment building in Brooklyn because his mother had to move jobs. Now he had to walk to and from school because she had to work and therefore couldn’t take him. He hated the people she worked for because they took her from him.

 

He also didn’t like his school because the Nuns didn’t like him due to his “attitude.” The only thing he liked about school was art. Steve loved to draw. His mother brought him paper and pencils whenever she could and he would lay on the floor for hours drawing anything he saw. Granted he was five and his drawings weren’t that good but he liked to draw anyway.

 

None of the kids in his class liked him either because he was small, skinny, and the son of a poor Irish immigrant mother. They also didn’t like him because he got into arguments constantly with people much bigger and stronger than him.

 

Unfortunately one of those people was a boy about a year older than him who decided to jump him on his walk back to his apartment. Steve just chose the best people to act like a self-righteous idiot to.

 

The boy in question came running down the street and straight into Steve. He slammed Steve down an alley and into the brick wall of one of the buildings on either side. Steve made a choked “ _ oof _ ” noise as his back hit the wall.

 

“You should have just stayed where you belonged and kept your nose to yourself!” The larger boy shouted in Steve’s face, spit flying everywhere.

 

“Yeah, well you should have left that girl alone! She didn’t want anything to do with you!” Steve said as he kneed the larger boy in the groin.

 

As you probably could have guessed the kid went down because skinny five-year-olds turn out to be pretty pointy in the joint areas. 

 

The bully’s immediate response was to get off the ground with a snarl and punch Steve right in the month where he promptly started to bleed from a split lip and his nose. 

 

Steve made an attempt to throw a punch at the bigger boy but it was caught and Steve was thrown into the trash cans with a huge crash. 

 

Steve managed to struggle back to his feet and he looked up at the bully defiantly and was promptly pushed back to the ground. 

 

Steven Grant Rogers was no quitter so, once again, he scrambled to his feet and faced the older boy with his little fists raised in the air.

 

“Hey!”

 

A shout from the mouth of the alley.

 

Steve looked to the mouth and saw an honest to God angel walking toward him. Huge black wings spread wide and taking up the entire alley’s width. The boy with the wings looked about six and he was advancing fast toward Steve and the bully.

 

“Pick on someone your own size!” the angel shouted again.

 

The bully took one look at those huge black wings and hauled ass out of the alley as fast as he possibly could. Angel boy clipped the bully on the head with one of his wings as he brushed past.

 

Steve looked up again. Irritated, and wiped the back of his wrist across his mouth to get some of the blood off.

 

“You didn’t need to do that. I had him on the ropes,” Steve said to the boy.

 

The boy looked at him with a really disappointed expression that did not belong on a six-year-old’s face.

 

“I’m sure you did but I’m not about to let my friend get beat up in an alley, now am I,” came the reply.

 

“We aren’t friends.”

 

“Sure we are ‘cause I just said so,” a pause, “but only if you want to.”

 

“Why would someone like you wanna be friends with someone like me?” Steve huffed.

 

“You stood up again after you’d been pushed down. Ma told me that’s a good quality for a person to have.”

 

“Well, if we’re gonna be friends, what’s your name? Mine’s Steve. Steve Rogers.”

 

“James Barnes,” James said, offering a hand out to Steve.

 

Steve took the offer and they shook.

 

“James is an awful boring name. We have like five James’ in our class alone,” Steve announced.

 

“Well, Steve isn’t exactly uncommon either.” 

 

“I was only saying you should have a nickname to set you apart,” Steve noted. “We can’t use Jim or Jem or anything like that cause those have been used before.”

 

“Oh, I’d just hate to be normal,” James said sarcastically.

 

“What’s your middle name?” Steve demanded.

 

“Buchanan,” James replied. “Why? You gonna make a name out of that?”

 

“Yeah, no, Buchanan’s too long to just use as a nickname,” Steve mused. “How about Buch?”

 

“No, that sounds weird,” James said. “Wouldn’t you feel weird calling me that all the time?”

 

“Yeah, guess so. Hmmmm. Buch. Buck,” Steve snapped his fingers sharply. “I know! How about Bucky!”

 

“Whatever you want Steve, as long as it’s not Buch,” Bucky said, looking down at the smaller boy. “How about we get out of here now and get home before our folks start to worry. We gotta get you cleaned up too. You’re bleedn’ everywhere.”

 

Bucky swiped at Steve’s chin with his thumb in vain to try and get the blood off.

 

“Yeah, guess so,” Steve agreed, “Where do you live?”

 

Bucky told Steve his address.

 

“I live in that building too! I just moved in!” Steve exclaimed.

 

“That’s good. Now I can get you home safely,” Bucky said.

 

“You’re only a year older than me, it doesn’t make you any more responsible.”

 

Bucky huffed, “C’mon let’s go,” as they started walking down the street once they’d bypassed the mouth of the alley. 

 

They had walked in companionable silence for a few minutes when Bucky spoke up, “Why haven't you asked about my wings yet? That’s the first thing most people say.”

 

“I figured that if you wanted to tell me, you would. Plus there’s really nothing to say, I think that they are beautiful and I’m a little jealous of them. There’s nothing special about me,” Steve said matter of factly.

 

“Don’t say that. You’re amazing! I saw your drawings in class today! You have talent,” came Bucky’s quick reply.

 

“Hmmm. Guess so,” Steve muttered. “Let’s just get home.”

 

~~~

 

When they got back to their apartment building they went up to Bucky’s floor where it turned out Steve had moved into the recently vacated apartment right next door. Bucky brought Steve into his apartment and with a little coaxing made him sit down so Bucky could begin to wash the blood off of his face. 

 

“You are alright, right?” Bucky asked softly.

 

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” Steve replied, just as soft.

 

Without them realizing, Bucky’s soft, feathered wings had come up around Steve and had loosely circled him protectively.

 

“What are you doing?” Steve said, confused, as he felt the soft feathers around him.

 

Bucky started and moved to put his wings back behind him, “Oh sorry.”

 

“No, it’s fine. You’re warm,” Steve gently pulled Bucky’s wings back around him and started examining his them with the detail only an artist could muster. 

 

Bucky cleared his throat, “I think your face is as clean as I can get it now. I can walk you home if you want.”

 

“Okay,” Steve got up and moved Bucky’s wings out of the way. “Let’s go.”

 

Bucky walked Steve over to his apartment which really wasn’t far enough to warrant an escort but he did anyway.

 

Steve turned, “I’ll see you tomorrow?” He said hopefully.

 

Bucky began to shut the apartment door, “Yeah, we can walk to school together.” 

 

“Goodbye.”

 

“Bye.”

 

~~~

 

“Ma!” Steve called as he heard the apartment door shut, signaling his mother’s return from work. “I made a new friend today!”

 

“Really! That’s great!” Sarah Rogers responded from the kitchen.

 

Steve came in the kitchen to talk to her as she made dinner, “Yeah, he’s in my class and his name is Bucky Barnes.”

 

“Barnes like next door Barnes?” Sarah asked.

 

“Yeah, it’s going to be nice having a friend next door,” Steve said happily. “We’re gonna walk to school together tomorrow.”

 

“I’m happy you found a friend. I know it was hard moving,” Sarah said as she finished up fixing them dinner and brought it over to the table.

 

Steve sat down and grabbed his plate. “I’m glad I found him too.”

 

* * *

  
  
So I really struggled with picking a song for this chapter so I just chose  [ Flowers in Your Hair by The Lumineers ](https://youtu.be/ZI5Xpl7H5O4) .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say to anyone who has or is going to read this, thank you. I think my friends are getting sick of me telling them that another person had read my fanfiction.


	3. Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve's mom finds out that Bucky has wings and they go to a park and do things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! This chapter is the longest yet! I'm going to try and keep updating weekly but next weeks might be a bit late as well as I will be in the middle of butt fuck nowhere without wifi. It'll be fun, don't worry. Camping is fun. Also, everyone who leaves Kudos gets cookies because I like seeing that turn up in my email.

“Mrs. Rogers?” Bucky knocked on Steve’s apartment door. “Steve?”

 

The door opened quickly at his knock and Steve’s mother appeared in the doorway. She looked at Bucky and did a quick double take, “Come in dear, Steve’s almost ready.”

 

Bucky walked through the apartment doorway. He was dressed in slacks and a white shirt with suspenders and his shirt had holes in the back with buttons on the top so his wings could poke through without causing him discomfort.

 

Steve’s mom ushered Bucky into the kitchen. “Steve!” she called. “Bucky’s here!”

 

“Bucky!” Steve comes skidding out of the bedroom and slams into Bucky with a small “oof” noise.

 

“Steve didn’t tell me you had wings,” Steve’s mom said as she fixed his collar.

 

“Really? I’d have thought that was my best quality,” Bucky said and added a quick “ma’am” as an afterthought.

 

“Please, call me, Sarah.”

 

“Yes, ma’- I mean Sarah,” Bucky replies over the head of Steve who was still clinging to him.

 

Sarah smiles at him gently, “You should go now so you aren’t late.”

 

“Bye, Ma,” Steve said in lieu of a reply and untangled himself from Bucky’s arms which were still around him and his wings were left twitching like they wanted to wrap around him like they had the night before.

 

“Let’s go, Buck,” Steve called behind him as he moved toward the door. Bucky followed and they walked out the door and down the apartment steps together onto the street.

 

“You didn’t tell her about me,” Bucky asked in a very small voice that didn’t sound like him at all.

 

“I did.”

 

“She seemed surprised by-,” Bucky gestured to his wings vaguely.

 

“I didn’t tell her about them, I just told her about you.”

 

“They are me,” Bucky said sadly.

 

“You’re not defined by them. They aren’t your personality. I told her about what an amazing person you are,” Steve replied sharply. “If you don’t want them to define you, they don’t have to.”

 

Bucky looked at his feet as they continued forward, “We’re gonna be late.”

 

They hurried on and sure enough, they were late. The nuns smacked their wrists for that but it was okay, they got to spend their day at school together as friends.

 

~~~

 

Bucky soon found out that school with a friend was much different than school without one. He found more joy in learning with Steve next to him. Art was particularly fun as Bucky found out that Steve could draw. 

 

“That’s amazing,” Bucky sighed as he watched Steve draw during their art section of the day.

 

“I guess so. Ma gets me pencils every chance she can,” Steve replied.

 

“The best thing I can do is numbers.”

 

Steve looked over to him, “Lookit that, Barnes, another thing about you not defined by those wings.

 

Said wings fluttered nervously and Bucky looked down, “S’not like I can fly with them even. My folks won’t let me try.”

 

“I’ll help you learn then,” Steve said matter-of-factly. “I can see if my Ma’ll take us to the park this weekend.”

 

“Okay,” Bucky replied and looked back down to his own drawing and cocked his head. “I don’t even remember what I was drawing.”

 

Steve laughed and cuffed him on the shoulder with one of his tiny fists.

 

~~~

 

They walked home together that night and the morning after that and every morning and evening that week until the weekend came with an unseasonably warm Saturday and Sarah agreed, with Bucky’s parents' permission, that she could take them to the park that day as she had the day off. 

  
  
  


The moment the two boys got off the bus they were running into the huge grassy fields that made up the park which was ringed by tall trees. Sarah followed after them a little slower as she called for them to be careful.

 

“Where do you want to go first?” Steve asked.

 

“I dunno,” Bucky replied. “Should we try the flying now or later?”

 

“Later, I think,” Steve said and as Bucky watched, he reached into his pocket and brought out a baseball. 

 

“Where’d you get that!” Bucky exclaimed excitedly.

 

“It was my Pa’s I think,” Steve said back as he threw the ball to Bucky who by that time had moved back and gotten ready to catch whatever Steve threw at him.

 

Bucky laughed delightedly and threw the ball back. They played catch for a very long time before they remembered that they had a mission to complete.

 

“Should we tell my Ma?” Steve asked Bucky. “What if something happens and you get hurt?”

 

“It won’t. I’m sure we’ll be fine. If anything happens to me you can just run and get her right,” Bucky reassured him.

 

“Right…” Steve replied.

 

The two of them walked toward a tree with branches low to the ground but was clear enough that Bucky probably wouldn’t hit a branch on the way down if it didn’t work. 

 

Bucky sighed and looked up at the tree. It was honestly one of the bigger ones in the park and even though it had low branches, he still couldn’t quite pull himself up.

 

Bucky glanced behind him at Steve’s ma who was reading on a bench a couple of meters away.

 

“Can you give me a hand?” Bucky said to Steve, indicating he needed help getting to the first branch.

 

“Oh, sure,” Steve grabbed Bucky and helped push him up into the tree. 

 

Both of them were breathing heavily by the time Bucky had his arms wrapped around the trunk of the tree, “Do you think I should be higher?”

 

“Maybe just a little. Ma won’t ever let us come back if you get hurt though so not too high, alright?” Steve told him.

 

Bucky nodded and hauled himself up a few more branches and looked down at Steve. He felt very small ad Steve looked even smaller than he already was. Bucky scooted a few more inches out onto the branch so he could open his wings and extend them. He flapped them gently and warmed up the muscles in them in hopes that it would help him even a little to be prepared for what was to come.

 

“Steve!” he called down the trunk.

 

Steve looked up at him, “Yeah, Buck?”

 

“Could you go farther out in front of the tree the way I’m facing ‘cause I have a feeling I’ll end up on the ground over there and not at the bottom if things go even slightly the way I want them to.”

 

Steve nodded up at him and walked a couple of meters farther out into the field in the direction Bucky had indicated.

 

Bucky flaps his wings again and spreads them wide before looking at the ground again quickly before looking back to Steve. Bucky took a deep breath before, with wings spread wide, he leaps.

 

Bucky’s wings caught the breeze and he soars a good fifteen feet before he starts to panic as he realizes the weightless feeling and plummets toward the grass.

 

“Bucky!” Steve shouts, sounding a bit panicked.

 

Bucky hit the ground with a thud that shakes his bones and an inhuman noise escapes his mouth. His forearms and knees ache from the way he landed and, wow, that’s gonna hurt in the morning but right now it doesn’t hurt enough to warrant tears so Bucky rolls onto his back with a groan. 

 

Steve’s leaning over him in an instant and when he sees Bucky is okay he attacks him with a hug.

 

“You did it! You flew!” Steve says happily into Bucky’s chest.

 

“I did!” Bucky laughed and he felt his wings starting to come up around him and Steve as they lay on the grass together celebrating Bucky’s victory.

 

“We should do this again next weekend,” Steve whispered.

 

“Kay,” Bucky whispered back.

 

“Boys!” they heard Sarah calling to them. “It’s time to go or we’ll miss the bus!”

 

Steve jumped up the moment Bucky’s wings had unwrapped from around him, “Coming, Ma!” 

 

Bucky got up just as fast and they ran together to Sarah and then to the bus. 

 

When they were seated Bucky turned to Sarah and said, “My folks told me to tell you guys that you are welcome at our place for dinner tonight if you like.”

 

“That’ll be lovely!”Sarah replied. “Steve, dear, would you like to go over to the Barnes’ for dinner?”

 

“Of course!”

 

Bucky smiled happily at Steve’s delight and settled back into his seat and waited for the ride to be over so he could spend more time with Steve.

 

~~~

 

They knocked on Bucky’s apartment door at precisely six o’clock and Bucky’s ma answered, “Please do come in.”

 

“Sarah Rogers,” Steve’s ma held out her hand. “You can call me Sarah. Very nice to meet you.”

 

Bucky’s ma took Sarah’s hand in both of hers, “Winifred Barnes. Please call me Winnie.”

 

Bucky looked at Steve with a look that said, “ _ oh no, what have we done. They’re gonna be friends now too _ ” as they all walked to the kitchen where Bucky’s father was at the counter making drinks. Bucky pulled out Steve’s chair for him just to be gentlemanly for his parents and rolled his eyes as their parents continued to make introductions. 

 

“Call me George” Barnes and Sarah shook hands and then, finally, they were all seated at the table with the food steaming in front of them. Bread and stew that had potatoes and carrots and beef in it. The meal looked amazing and Bucky wasn’t surprised his parents had made something special for the occasion of someone coming over. It didn’t happen that often what with how Bucky looked.

 

The food was served and everyone chatted as they ate. The adults talked about work and they asked each other about their lives and they talked about the boys. Bucky finished his food quickly and when he looked to Steve he saw that he was done too.

 

“May we be excused?” Bucky asked his parents.

 

“Sure, son,” his father replied without looking away from the person he was talking to who had briefly stopped her chatter to watch Steve and Bucky exit the room.

 

Bucky took Steve down the short hallway that led to his bedroom and they sat down on Bucky’s bed.

 

“Today was such an amazing day,” Steve sighed.

 

“It was. I wish it would never end,” Bucky replied.

 

“Me neither.”

 

Bucky felt his eyes growing heavy. It had been a long day and his belly was full of his ma’s amazing cooking and his best friend lay next to him curled up like a cat. Subconsciously, Bucky’s wings had curled around Steve like a blanket and they fell asleep like that, tucked in together. When both their mothers came in later to check on them, they both smiled at their boys and smiled to themselves. Both were glad their boys each had someone they could rely on, even at their young age.

 

~~~

 

Bucky and Steve woke up in the morning and continued on. They walked to and from school together. They went to the park every weekend that Steve’s ma had a day free and Bucky got to practice his flying. Fall eventually moved on and winter came roaring in with a vengeance. The morning Bucky woke to find frost on his window was the morning he learned about all of Steve’s medical maladies which, as he soon discovered, they had been lucky enough to avoid until the cold and the damp arrived.

 

 

* * *

 

 

The song for this chapter is  [ Paradise by Coldplay ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbVz0jP722g) . I’m really struggling with finding songs recently that match the chapter, so I once again chose a song that fits a little bit but I really like. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I bet all the people who got my joke in the first chapter about baby birds thought Bucky's parents were going to yeet him outa the apartment window. Your dreams have been crushed. He will get yeeted out of a train though.;)


	4. Steve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve gets sick and Bucky freaks out(kind of).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you know. This chapter is actually out on time. My beta is actually gone on a trip as was I so I convinced my mom to edit this chapter. So I'm super happy it got out on time even though I thought it wouldn't.
> 
> I have exciting news actually. I have a friend who is a super good artist and I commissioned her to do a piece for this fic so we're gonna have art soon. When it's finished I'll add it to that week's chapter. It won't be super soon but probably in the next month or so. When that happens I'll link her Tumblr and such so if you want to commission her too, you can. 
> 
> As always, I appreciate every single person who reads, bookmarks and leaves kudos on this fic. My friends are really getting sick of me telling them that another person has read it every hour. Thank you, guys.

 

Steve wakes up with a terrible headache and a scratchy throat that hurts every time a cough wracks his small frame. He aches everywhere from his joints to his muscles to his bones. He coughs again and tears fall down his face from the pain. His chest is tight when he takes in breaths that are far too shallow. This has happened before, he reassures himself. I’m not going to die. It sure felt like he was going to die. He just wanted to be a normal kid that didn’t get sick every other week. 

 

Steve can hear his Ma coming down the hall, “Steve?” she says as she opens his bedroom door. “You have to get up now or you’ll be late.”

 

Steve tries to lean up on his elbows but fails and falls back to the pillows. He feels so hot. 

 

Also cold.

 

Hot and cold at the same time?

 

His Ma rushes over to him and presses her palm to his forehead. The coolness of it feels so nice. “Oh, honey, you have a fever.” she walks back out of the room quickly with a wet cloth and gently places it over his forehead. “I’m gonna call it and say no school today, alright?”

 

All Steve can do in reply is to groan weakly and make a failed attempt to push his quilt down his bed.

 

“No, don’t do that. I know you’re hot but you have to keep them on,” his Ma soothes him as she pushes his wrists gently back onto his chest. “I have to go to work today but I can ask if Winnie can come in and check on you occasionally.”

 

Steve nods and his Ma is just shutting the bedroom door when he hears a knock coming from the front door. 

 

“Steve?”

 

Of course, it’s Bucky. How could Steve have forgotten? He walks to school with him literally every day. He’s Steve best friend in the whole world.

 

He hears the door open and his Ma greets Bucky.

 

“Steve’s sick today,” she tells him gently. “He won’t be going to school.”

 

“Can I see him quick before I go?” Bucky asks with a hint of a whine in his voice that just about breaks Steve’s heart just hearing it.

 

“Be quick,” Steve’s Ma tells him, but by the first word, Steve could hear he was already halfway down the hall.

 

The door opens with a sharp snap and Bucky tumbles through it with very little coordination. Like his one goal was to reach Steve, not caring if he hits the door frame with his shoulders in the process.

 

“Steve.” Bucky breathes as his eyes land on Steve laying in his bed.

 

“Hey, Buck. Sorry, you had to see me like this,” Steve manages through trying to suck in enough air. “Jinxed it by thinking maybe I wouldn’t get sick.”

 

Bucky gives him an anguished look and throws himself onto the bed. Being mindful not to land on Steve.

 

Speaking of which, one of them along with Bucky’s left arm had draped over Steve’s chest and his faced pressed into Steve’s neck.

 

“You don’t have to hide that you get sick from me, Stevie,” Bucky said, although he sounds a bit muffled due to the position of his mouth. “I’m your best friend and I worry ‘bout you. You’re a danger to yourself sometimes.”

 

“Yeah, Buck. I remember how we met,” Steve wraps the arm not trapped under Bucky around his shoulders and grips him as tight as he can as another fit of coughs begins. Steve knows Bucky can feel him shaking with it and Bucky gets up off of him to give him more air.

 

“Bucky!” Steve’s Ma calls from the kitchen. “You’re gonna be late! C’mon!”

 

“I’ll see you after school?” Bucky says hopefully to Steve who’s coughing fit had ended by then.

 

“Yeah, ‘course,” Steve replies. “Tell the nuns I won’t be there.”

 

“Bye,” Bucky said as the very tips of the feathers on his wings brushed over Steve’s eyelids. It felt nice. Feathers are very soft.

 

“Bye, Buck. See you later.”

 

~~~

 

The rest of Steve’s day was pretty uneventful. He ate the soup that his Ma had left for him from dinner a couple of nights ago. Winnie had checked in on him a few time to make sure he was alright and each and every time he assured her he was fine. His coughing fits didn’t get any better and neither did his fever. His bones and joints still ached but that wasn’t new even with the sick. It just got a bit more painful. Steve always ached in some place or another. His mom had told him that the doctors had thought that he wouldn’t survive his first week but here he was, five years later. Over the years, doctors had diagnosed him with a multitude of problems. All of which he had soldiered through because he was not going to die because his stupid heart wasn’t strong enough. Now that he had Bucky, life was even more worth living and he was going to fight for every second of breath that he had.

 

He just couldn’t wait for Bucky to get back.

 

So, instead of staring at the ceiling, Steve decided to sleep until Bucky returned from school.

 

~~~

 

Steve woke when he heard a knock at the front door. He didn’t know what time it was but he could only assume it was Bucky because he heard the front door slowly open and shut again. There are only three people who let themselves into his house and that’s his Ma, Bucky’s Ma and Bucky. 

 

So, it had to be Bucky.

 

“Bucky?” Steve manages to croak out as his bedroom door creak open. “That you?”

 

“Yeah, Stevie,” Bucky replies as he comes in. “It’s me.”

 

Steve makes grabby hands at him and Bucky sighs and shuts the door behind him before he walks over to Steve where he is lying in his bed.

 

“How was school?” Steve asks. “What’d I miss?”

 

“Not much. It was all the normal stuff. The nuns asked where you were and I told them you were sick,” Bucky lies down next to Steve and covers him with one big, warm wing. Steve curls his fingers into the feathers gently and drags them down. He feels Bucky shiver happily so he does it again. It was kind of like petting a very large cat. 

 

If the cat had feathers and was as big as his Ma’s wardrobe.

 

“I’m sorry I got sick,” Steve whispers sadly around his sore throat. “It usually happens way more often. We were really lucky I didn’t get sick in the months you’ve known me so far.”

 

“Hey,” Bucky whispers back. “It’s not your fault. Everyone gets sick.”

 

Steve sighs sadly and looks away from his friend to the wall, “The problem is I get sick all the time. I’ve had my last rites once already. No one thought I was going to survive.”

 

“Steve-” Bucky tries to say before Steve cuts him off.

 

“No, Buck. I don’t want your sympathy. Just let me say this. My Ma says I have a bunch of incurable illnesses and she won’t tell me what they all are unless I make it to my tenth birthday because she doesn’t want me to worry too much. That probably means she doesn’t expect me to live that long. I’m just gonna live while I’m alive so don’t pity me.” Steve’s voice cracks on the last word and he can feel the tears forming in his eyes. 

 

“Aw, Stevie,” Bucky says to him quietly. “I’m not gonna pity you. We’re gonna do anything we want and enjoy it.”

 

Steve sniffs and turns so his face is hidden in the space between Bucky’s wing where it’s draped over him and his shoulder.

 

“How ‘bout for my birthday we go out and do something fun together,” Bucky says over the top of his head. “Maybe our parents will take us to Central Park and we can fly again.”

 

Steve nods wearily against him in agreement, “I think I’ll just sleep some more,” he says dreamily.

 

“You do that, “ Bucky says with a hint of a laugh in his voice. “I’m not going anywhere.”

 

~~~

 

Steve did get better.

 

After a few days, he was off to school again even if he did still have a slight cough.

 

After a week it was like he hadn’t been sick at all and he back to getting into trouble with Bucky and helping him learn to fly on the weekends. Steve loved the way the fluffy snow poofed around Bucky when he landed. He loved how the bright snow contrasted with his dark wings. 

 

Yes, sir.

 

Steve was going to live like each day would be his last and he was going to enjoy each one with his best friend.

 

* * *

 

This chapters song is [ Holdin’ Out by The Lumineers ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_x0Yzf4Ifo). If you haven't noticed already, I love their music and this will definitely not be the last you hear of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you may have noticed that there is a chapter count now. It is an estimate. It will probably change.


	5. An apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry...

Ok so, here's the deal. I'm not satisfied at all with how this fic is going so far because it's not coming out how I want and it doesn't follow canon good enough so I'm going to mostly rewrite it and post it. I'm not abandoning it but editing it so it fits canon and sounds how I want and it will take a bit so be patient, please. I'm going to make it into a series instead of one fic and the art I promised will still be in it.

I promise it will be back within the next week or so. Please keep reading it people who enjoy it. 

I'll post the like [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18227765/chapters/43125779) when the first chapter is up.

**Author's Note:**

> So I really love music so I’m going to try to find at least one song that goes with each chapter and they'll go at the end of the chapter 'cause you apparently can't put embedded links in the notes.


End file.
